A Necessary Element For Any Good Relationship

Erik Cooper —  August 25, 2011 — 4 Comments

The local IHOP was home to another round of goodbyes this morning. The last time I had the courage to eat there, we were loading my brother and sister-in-law into a U-Haul bound for Houston.

Today, our friends the Solets are heading back to the South Louisiana bayou after nearly three weeks hanging with us here in Indy.

(The IHOP is now synonymous with both sadness and rampant indigestion).

Darrell is a cardiologist (that, ehem, eats at IHOP?), and came to Indy to sit for his board exams. Lois and the boys traveled early for a week of summer camp and an extended time of reconnection with friends that have become more like family over the years.

We’ve enjoyed some memorable times together over the last decade.

  • Ellis Marsalis live at the Snug Harbor Jazz Bistro in downtown New Orleans.
  • A tour of the Netherlands on a bus full of musicians.
  • Cut-throat competition at Walt Disney World’s Toy Story Mania.
  • Long conversations over a firepit while the kids jumped on the trampoline in our backyard.

But there’s one thing I’m most grateful for with these lovely friends of ours.

They pursued us.

We weren’t looking for new friends. We were surrounded by a flurry of activity. Ministry. Family. And honestly, a circle of very close relationships (one which we now call “co-pastor).

But as pastors (heck, as humans), it’s easy to even subconsciously begin to hold your cards close. To be around people without really letting them in. I’m grateful for the Solets and a few others (you know who you are) that never let us get away with staying there. Our life is richer because of you.

Relationships of any kind need a pursuer. Someone that pushes through the resistance. That refuses to stay on the outside. That won’t allow life to remain floating on the surface. We’ve had a few of those beautiful people in our lives. I hope we’ve learned how to be that for a few others, too.

Want better relationships? Find the courage to become a pursuer. Somebody’s got to do it.

Thank you Darrell & Lois. We’re glad you never gave up on us. Honored to call you friends.

4 responses to A Necessary Element For Any Good Relationship

  1. If you ever post another ugly picture of me, I’m gonna pursue you with a stick. ;D

    I suppose I could give you better material to work with, though. 🙂

    Seriously, thnx for having (putting up with) us.

    Love you guys…

    • My fourth grade teacher used to say, “That’s what you looked like when the camera went off.”

      You are a photographer…should’ve let you take your own pic.

      Travel safe….

  2. She looks beautiful. Eric, if you keep posting stuff like that, they may move back. Then I’ll have to endure the sad goodbyes. Beautiful tribute to a precious family.

    • Thanks Faith, but I think they’re in a pretty good place right now. That’s the great thing about real friendship, it wants the best for the other person. The miles haven’t seemed to short change our connection. That’s the beauty of it all.

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