Lonely is at Least Safe

Erik Cooper —  November 29, 2010 — 3 Comments

You must risk what you fear the most, to gain what you long for the most.

It’s a truth any entrepreneur understands. But it’s reality for all of us.  Risk to gain. I’m especially awakening to this in the area of relationships.  Even my closest ones.

We all long for deep connection.  To know and be known. It’s hard-wired into our DNA, evident since Adam and Eve walked naked in the Garden of Eden.  Man was created to be real, exposed, authentic (“I’m out there, Jerry, and I’m loving every minute of it!”).

With each other.

With God.


But sin created a gap, and like Adam and Eve we cover up.  The essence of our true selves still (somewhat) there, but shrouded to expose only the “acceptable” parts. The partial me.  The pieces I want you to see.

Because the rest brings shame. The rest becomes a target for judgment and ridicule. And who can blame us? We have a history of destroying one another through exposed weakness. So stay covered.  Stay hidden. Lonely is at least safe.

And therein lies the risk.

You long to be known as you really are. In all your weaknesses. All your insecurities. All your fears. That’s a risk, and risk means it may not work out like you planned.  In fact, it may not work out at all.

But are you willing to risk what you fear the most, to gain what you long for the most?

3 responses to Lonely is at Least Safe

  1. This is good Eric. It’s a trust issue right? Fear of judgement, ridicule, embarrasement. Risky stuff indeed.

  2. Thank you for writing this! Funny that last night I realized that two people who are pretty close to me don’t particularly like me, (they actually told me)(Oh don’t you love family gatherings!)but I am in the relationships because God put me there. (He did choose my family…) When I heard/realized this I found it really painful. I was speechless. (I found saying that to someone pretty obnoxious- ) But God comforted me by reminding me that HE likes me. A LOT. And HE likes all of us. FOR REAL. More than anyone. And so that is what needs to matter the most. I thought of how He affirmed Jesus by reinforcing his true identity by saying “This is my son, in whom I am well pleased.” Now I understand more personally how important it was for Jesus to know this before He went along to minister to people. Some who adored him, and many who hated him, and even more that were pretty indifferent. I know we need each other, and it feels amazing to be loved and celebrated, but sometimes, especially if you are representing Him, He is the only one who is going to be loving you. And that is enough.

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